The priest came over and exceeded my expectations of what a wonderful person she is. She was totally supportive and in fact, insistent that we walk the path that is laid out for us. We had a good chat and when she left, said "the Goddess bless you." I beamed, I must say.
I think her biggest concern was that she or someone at the church had done something that hurt us and caused us to stay away. Once we assured her that wasn't the case, she was more at ease and we had a good time.
I usually do make situations in my mind larger than they end up being in reality but it was still a very huge relief to make the break, turn in my key and put Christianity behind me. I feel unfettered now, much lighter and freer to be me.
I woke up and cleaned up the rest of the house. Well, I straightened up the rest of the house but I didn't get the clothes hung out because I just ran out of steam. Then I spent a few minutes invoking the Goddess, something I don't normally do in the morning, and lit some candles and incense so I felt a bit more prepared to face Mary.
My fears had more to do with my reactions and the way I always cave in, in order to avoid confrontations, but aside from one very brief moment, I didn't feel that I needed to go back to church, didn't feel pressured to remain Christian and didn't once feel a need to gain her approval.
And just to prove how cool she is, she mentioned to us about a park near her house where they lit a bonfire on Midsummer and will find out for us if there are any other activities we might be interested in. She wants to stay in touch as friends as well. Totally unlike any other member of the clergy I've ever met before.
I intend to finish up the faery garden this week and get my herbs planted. They'll be in pots so I can bring them in for the winter. The echinacea will be more difficult as I have to turn the ground a bit to find a place for them. I want them on the side of the hill. The rest of the herbs hopefully will turn out well in pots though.
And I'm thrilled to discover that I have 5 sunflowers growing. Last year the rabbits ate them as soon as they grew out of the ground. This year they're leaving them to grow. It's for the critters in the back yard, mostly the birds but they do tend to drop the seeds onto the ground so the rabbits get their share.
My cardinals are gone. I haven't seen them for a few days. I looked into the clemantis and didn't see a nest but I didn't investigate thoroughly so there may yet be one but since they're not around, I'll try to get rid of the tree growing in the midst of the flowers. It may be they decided it was too busy there and chose a different spot. At any rate, I'm glad for their company in the meantime.
Tonight will be an early night I hope in spite of the nap I took instead of supper. I'm hoping to be more productive if I get more rest at night. So far there is no indication of it but I have been pushing myself a bit more each day and aside from one really bad day, have been successful in getting more done. Maybe now that I don't have that burden weighing me down, I'll be more relaxed and find a way out of this mire of fatigue.
I'm also planning on doing some Druid studies in preparation for Lughnasadh, one of my favorite days of the year as I have a particular affection for Lugh. Don't ask me why because I haven't a clue but he has beckoned me and I find the call compelling. It's time I fully committed to this path and enjoy all the new things there are to learn.
Enough rambling and babbling. I'm having a hard time forming coherent thoughts due to the fatigue so I'm off to bed and hopefully sweet, sweet dreams.