Had lunch with Zach today. It sounds odd to say we had lunch when we're together nearly 24/7 but truth is we don't talk much at home. Usually we only talk when we go out for lunch. Bizarre.
Anyway, we talked a lot about spiritual matters this time. I'm still grieving a bit over losing the rituals of the Episcopal Church and needed to talk about it. It helps me make sense of what I'm feeling. I realized that I haven't minded losing St. Mark's as much as losing the Episcopal Church because St. Mark's was really light on ritual. It was mostly a Sunday-only church and the priest never wore the collar. The only time she was in uniform was during the service when she wore her vestments.
What I wanted in a liturgical church was a full-time priest who acted like one all the time and services for everything, including the Daily Office. Anything like that is too far away to be a part of so I'm back to feeling cheated. St. Mark's was full of wonderful people but they were mostly senior citizens and not looking too hard to fix the demographics. Most of the congregation lived out of town so anything other than Sunday morning service was asking too much. Plus with an elderly congregation like that, having anything at night means a significant percentage of your congregation isn't going to be there...especially in a Wisconsin winter.
We do have a Catholic Church here in town that does it all but I just can't connect to that. Too many rules and regulations.
It was good to talk it all out because it made going back to St. Mark's unpalatable since I won't find what I was looking for there. I was glad to close that door once and for all.
I also decided I wasn't going to celebrate Imbolc. At least not this year. I won't commit beyond that, but it's just not something that gets me excited. Especially with 6 inches of snow on the ground. We don't see the beginning of spring until late April, if then. I think one of the reasons I was on the path of the circle of the year was because it's all I knew of modern Paganism. Now that I have more scenery to look at, I'm enjoying a brief tour or two in other cities. And I definitely like the city that has Greco-Roman practices going on. It's just that I like some Britain in there, too. I guess, like Zach, I'll need to forge my own path. And I'm really okay with that.
I definitely like the Solstices and Equinoxes. And Samhain. But beyond that, I just don't get excited about the others, which would explain why I'm crap at celebrating them. And what's not to love about the full and new moons?
But I'm not stressing at all over what to do or what to believe. I'm just sorting things out a bit to get rid of the clutter so I can enjoy what I do like.
All in all it was a productive day spiritually and I suspect tonight will be just as good. I'm still not reading anything specific and I hope to get down to studying herbs and crystals, thanks to my dearest friend Tana who bought me the books. That's what intrigues me. Not what to say or do in ritual, but what things mean and how things work. I really like that. Although I do still need ritual, which I am incorporating into my life in a leisurely, natural way. It fits better that way rather than doing someone else's ritual that fits like second-hand clothes.
And I'm off to cuddle up in bed with my knitting and some tv watching. Is there a God of television? Because I want to dedicate an altar to him...right now.
May the Gods and Goddesses smile on you in all your endeavors.
Anyway, we talked a lot about spiritual matters this time. I'm still grieving a bit over losing the rituals of the Episcopal Church and needed to talk about it. It helps me make sense of what I'm feeling. I realized that I haven't minded losing St. Mark's as much as losing the Episcopal Church because St. Mark's was really light on ritual. It was mostly a Sunday-only church and the priest never wore the collar. The only time she was in uniform was during the service when she wore her vestments.
What I wanted in a liturgical church was a full-time priest who acted like one all the time and services for everything, including the Daily Office. Anything like that is too far away to be a part of so I'm back to feeling cheated. St. Mark's was full of wonderful people but they were mostly senior citizens and not looking too hard to fix the demographics. Most of the congregation lived out of town so anything other than Sunday morning service was asking too much. Plus with an elderly congregation like that, having anything at night means a significant percentage of your congregation isn't going to be there...especially in a Wisconsin winter.
We do have a Catholic Church here in town that does it all but I just can't connect to that. Too many rules and regulations.
It was good to talk it all out because it made going back to St. Mark's unpalatable since I won't find what I was looking for there. I was glad to close that door once and for all.
I also decided I wasn't going to celebrate Imbolc. At least not this year. I won't commit beyond that, but it's just not something that gets me excited. Especially with 6 inches of snow on the ground. We don't see the beginning of spring until late April, if then. I think one of the reasons I was on the path of the circle of the year was because it's all I knew of modern Paganism. Now that I have more scenery to look at, I'm enjoying a brief tour or two in other cities. And I definitely like the city that has Greco-Roman practices going on. It's just that I like some Britain in there, too. I guess, like Zach, I'll need to forge my own path. And I'm really okay with that.
I definitely like the Solstices and Equinoxes. And Samhain. But beyond that, I just don't get excited about the others, which would explain why I'm crap at celebrating them. And what's not to love about the full and new moons?
But I'm not stressing at all over what to do or what to believe. I'm just sorting things out a bit to get rid of the clutter so I can enjoy what I do like.
All in all it was a productive day spiritually and I suspect tonight will be just as good. I'm still not reading anything specific and I hope to get down to studying herbs and crystals, thanks to my dearest friend Tana who bought me the books. That's what intrigues me. Not what to say or do in ritual, but what things mean and how things work. I really like that. Although I do still need ritual, which I am incorporating into my life in a leisurely, natural way. It fits better that way rather than doing someone else's ritual that fits like second-hand clothes.
And I'm off to cuddle up in bed with my knitting and some tv watching. Is there a God of television? Because I want to dedicate an altar to him...right now.
May the Gods and Goddesses smile on you in all your endeavors.
Imbolc isn't my favourite holiday either. I prefer to celebrate it as Groundhog Day!
ReplyDeleteI wrote a post about Imbolc last year and my experiences when I tune into it's energies...I believe that each Turn of the Wheel means something completely different for each individual.
ReplyDeleteTake a gander if you please...
http://darkmothergoddess.blogspot.com/2010/02/magical-mondays-imbolc.html
Debra, I can't even get excited over GH day because of all the stupid snow and cold here. And because I don't trust the furry little beggar. LOL And yes, I'm cranky because my cold is back.
ReplyDeleteDM, I loved that article. That is definitely something I can incorporate into my life. I love candles and must, very soon, start making them. Thanks so much for the ideas. With that in mind, I can celebrate Imbolc with the promise of what's to come.