Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Spring is coming back along with my health

My health is returning along with my longing for green grass and flowers in the yard.  With the weather warming up I long to be outdoors working in the yard.  And that's not something I usually feel like doing.  I also would love to take a walk but I'm not healed enough for that yet.  Soon though...very soon.

I stayed in bed over the weekend and did some reading but mostly I slept.  I have a lot to study now, having downloaded more free books on my Kindle.  One of these days I'll list those that are still free but not today.  I'm going to take a nap very soon because I woke up when Tom got home from work and was up the rest of the night until near-dawn.  After that the dog kept waking me up nearly every hour to go outside and bark at something in the evergreen tree between our house and the neighbor's.  I suspect a chipmunk or a squirrel. 

I'm still very much on target as an eclectic witch/pagan in spite of the negative remarks I've seen on other blogs and groups about it.  On the other hand, I've also noticed an increase of defensive statements about eclectics so evidently people are fighting back.  I'm not too bothered by it; if the remarks are too repugnant, I just never read that blog again.  Mostly though they are condescending while patting the blog writer on the back for having the more proper pagan path.  It's okay.  I grew up with these attitudes in my birth religion.  I gave up being shocked over it after the first year of paganism.

I'm eager to get busy doing craft things and working with herbs and my vegetable garden.  I need order in my home first.  Three weeks of being sick and a couple of weeks of dealing with travel plans to say good bye to my mother have wreaked havoc on the house.  Tom is working incredibly long hours at work and while Zach is helping me to keep up, he's not skilled in knowing what clutter goes where.  It's like that is my reward for having too much stuff.

And it's the clutter that is my nemesis.  My husband hates to get rid of anything so we are bursting at the seams with too much furniture in a too little house and too much "stuff" that we don't need, haven't used in years or have no room to use.  I have no counter space in the kitchen to actually do any real cooking so I'm planning on moving some things out of the kitchen into the dining room as an extension of the kitchen counter so I have room to cook.  He's not thrilled with the idea but when I say I have no room, I mean I have NO room.  Not that I have a bitty space but that there is nothing available.  I have to move things aside to do any cooking.  And when I'm ready to start working on herbs and kitchen witchery I'm going to need room.  So since that is my workspace, I'm going to do what I need to do.  And I'm going to stop asking permission from him to do things with my own house as well.  We got stuck on that when I was a fundamentalist and submissive wife.  I haven't seemed able to quit doing it so far.

But today I'm going to work on my bedroom and get back to doing daily rituals.  I have missed them, especially the incense.  Since my breathing is so much easier, I can stand some incense at least once a day.  Maybe not twice but it's a start.  I'm going to move the bookcase into my room as well since I really don't have a place for all my spiritual books.  Plus a lot of my dvds are in that bookcase.  It's a bitty thing, only 3 feet tall with two shelves in addition to the top but it will make more sense in my room than the bins of yarn I have in there.  I can put them in the dining room and hide them under blankets for now.  Until I get a better system, that is.

Well, it's time for a nap and then more work on the bedroom.  It may take weeks to catch up but better that than get it done quickly and end up back in bed.

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