Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Remnants of what would have been a good post if I could have remembered what I was going to say

I had all kinds of things I was going to write about today until I pulled up this page.  Now my mind is blank.  Completely blank.

I'll just have to wing it.

I'm not going to celebrate Imbolc or Candlemas this year.  I just can't get myself to want to.  However, there are some Greek festivals coming up that do appeal to me.  I need to study more about them but one is called Anthesteria.  It celebrates flowers, spring and the dead.  I'll write more about that when it comes up, which is this Saturday through Monday.  I did study up on Imbolc and tried to come up with enthusiasm about it but it just didn't happen.  Maybe I'm not as far from Hellenic practices as I thought.  I'm still not reconstructionist though.  At least I'm not now.  I won't discount anything about the future.

I'm curious what will happen to my relationship with Persephone when she leaves the Underworld and spends time up here with the living.  I'm not worried about it; just curious.  I've been wanting something to wear that makes me feel my connection with her and have been thinking about maybe a black stone or something simple.  I found a black pendant with a black key decorated with red jewels (fake, of course) and that really does make me think of Persephone so I bought it and hope to make the chain to go with it tomorrow.

I also bought some non-alcoholic wine for ritual.  It's not that I'm adverse to the leaded stuff, but you can buy unleaded in the stores.  And I didn't want to make a special trip to the liquor store.  I might when this runs out though.  Plus, because of my medication, I can't drink alcohol but I can drink this.  In moderation because it has sugar in it, of course.   A sip or two won't hurt me though.  Neither will a sip or two of wine but it will probably go bad before it got all used up.  Zach's not a fan of alcoholic drinks and Tom doesn't drink at all.

The past couple of nights I haven't done any ritual or prayer, nor did I feel bad about it.  I was tired and the gods knew just how tired I was.  There is a thing with reconstructionists about miasma, not approaching the gods when you're soiled or ill or not clean in some way.  I don't subscribe to that but dealing with all that energy flow when mine is sapped didn't make a lot of sense to me so I abstained.  And merely offered the gods a bit of love from a distance.  My bed, that is.

Today, however, even though I'm still tired, I'm eager to get back to it.  I miss it when I'm unable to attend the gods and my altar.  And I miss my studies, which have gone by the wayside because of the fatigue.  Hopefully with Tom gone ice fishing I'll have few distractions this weekend and will be able to restore, renew and revive.

Oh, and for anyone who read my mundane blog yesterday, you know that I had to walk across town to pick up the truck from the garage.  It was an hour's walk which, with my dodgy hip and the hilly terrain, was extremely painful.  Pan had been whispering in my ear to get outdoors more.  I just want to say to him...I am not amused. :)

BB

4 comments:

  1. I think they do, too, Lady Imbrium. In fact, those times away make me more eager for ritual and prayer. :)

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  2. He is a cheeky bastid isn't he? I guess we walk different paths because I don't have those issues about tending my altar and studying. Those things sound like work. I'm too Pagany/hippy to work. I'd rather roll around in the dirt or dance nude around a fire ; )

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  3. I think the gods know who needs ritual in their lives and who don't need it. And maybe that's how they call us to them. Who knows? For me it's not work, but a connection. And it's not like I spend hours and hours doing ritual stuff. I rarely even spend an hour a day at my altar. More like 15 minutes, to be honest.

    Not big on dancing nude, especially since I tend to list to the right, but this summer I am going to dance to the full moon a time or two. :)

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