Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Another birthday

Today is Zach's 24th birthday so we did the traditional Pizza Hut experience except this year he got free chocolate dipping sticks.  One nearly put me in a diabetic coma so I quit after that.  I love to watch him grow up and become his own man.

As usual, we talked about everything while there, including our spiritual paths.  One thing he brought up was that in my search for something that fulfilled me, while a Christian, we went the Messianic Jewish route, except we were Messianic Gentiles.  And believe me, the Gentiles are never treated as well as the real Jews are in this venue.  They can say what they want; we were treated as second-class citizens.  I used to cry at night because I wasn't born Jewish so that I could experience completely instead of from the sidelines.

Zach enjoyed it a lot because he was pretty young then and liked the rituals we did and didn't have to deal with people telling you that it wasn't your heritage and you were co-opting their religion.  In truth, they were right but not just about me.  The whole concept was wrong because they made something that was millenia in age and tried to put a modern spin on it and claim they were the real Jews after all.

But it brought to my mind one of the problems I had before with Hellenic polytheism.  It wasn't my heritage.  At least I don't think it is.  I think my experiences being treated badly in Messianic Judaism is why I've felt a need to find the religion of my ancestors.  As if I needed a claim on the pantheon I should worship.

Oddly, I don't feel that way anymore.  In part because of my sojourn through Norse polytheism.  I got a little tired of the mindset of needing to have ancestors that were Norse, or Germanic or Anglo Saxon.  Granted, not everyone in Asatru does that but enough people that I lost my need to do what my ancestors did.  Besides, who's to say what my ancestors were like?  I'm sure by now they don't care much about it and are just content with me being comfortable in my own practices.

I'm becoming more and more convinced that the Greeks did actually practice back then what we call magic today.  Besides, I'm not limiting myself to a particular era in Greek history as some do.  I'm definitely not recon.  Not to say that recon is bad...just not my cuppa.  I think the gods were looked at very differently from era to era.

I was looking at the store today in their picture section and found a beautiful framed picture of a peacock that took my breath away but not only was it out of my budget, but it was also way too big for my altar.  If I could find something like that in a quarter of the size, it would be perfect.  I really do love Hera.

We're attempting to take this month, from Hecate's Deipnon to Hecate's Deipnon and clean house so that by next month we can do a cleansing on the house during the dark moon.  It's pretty ambitious for me with my fatigue and pain issues, but I still think I need to set goals.

I'm also still doing a lot of reading, mostly on magic right now.  I'm feeling more and more confident in my capabilities although the tarot cards still manage to elude me most of the time and my animal oracle cards have taken on new meanings so that the original meanings in the booklet don't match anymore.  I think that's a good thing, though.


  1. It has occurred to me as the Hellenes take an ever larger portion of my flat household surfaces for their own use that they are in fact the gods of your heritage by virtue of being a citizen of the Western world. It was their people and their ideas that merged with the ideals of the Romans and that fugue forms the basis for most Western thought, whether we admit it or not. Certainly it is not an exclusive influence, but it is a primary one.

    1. That's really in sync with my reasoning when I decided to just go with my heart. I had been watching the making of Percy Jackson on the dvd and the author, Rick Riordan, mentioned that ancient Greek and the gods permeated all of society in ways that were immeasurable. In a way we have more influence from Greek mythology than any other sort. So I did kind of figure that it was mine by virtue of that fact.

      And they do tend to take over the flat spaces, don't they?