Learning curve

I have been wilting in this heat feeling decidedly unspiritual.  I did have a lovely full moon ritual at the family altar with incredible results.  I was energized the next day, even to the degree that I walked the dog and ate well.  Then the heat set in and I haven't lit a single candle or uttered a single prayer.

It's been a good lesson for me how self-centered I can be.  It never occurred to me to use my electric candles and my prayer book still works when the weather is crap.  I, however, don't.  Not too well, at least.  But it's a lesson that I needed to learn:  the Gods are still there even when I'm too focused on myself to acknowledge them.  And so I should take extra care during those times of self-pity to focus on others rather than myself.

Oddly this lesson didn't hurt as bad from a Pagan perspective.  When I was a Christian it came across harshly and in a mean-spirited way.  There was never a gentle touch to it, just a virtual slap to the face and an admonition to keep my eyes on Jesus and I wouldn't have time to feel sorry for myself.  I'm so glad the Gods aren't as mean-spirited as some Christians can be.

So, lesson learned and plans made to work through it.  And lots of leeway given to myself for those times I drop the ball in the future.  No more beating myself up.

And I'm planning on an electric candle tonight.  I really don't need anymore heat in this house.

BB