Friday, July 8, 2011

Building my foundations

It's definitely summer here.  I've spent the past few nights murdering mosquitoes.  I'm not big on killing animals or creatures of any kind, which makes my omnivorous diet a bit of a quandry.  Still, that whole circle of life thing, you know.  But mosquitoes don't get to live in my house, and since I can't escort them to the door like I can flies or spiders, they die.  I killed 12 last night, 27 the night before.  There is a hole somewhere in this house where they've charging admission.  Ideally I would love to be a vegan but I need meat in my diet and I love leather.

And no, I"m not going to feel guilty about it anymore. 

I was able to get some reading done this morning before things got hectic.  Triumph of the Moon is wonderful so far but I'm still in the first chapter, where Professor Hutton is talking about the history of Paganism and how it became viewed as a vicious and evil religion.  Some of it I already knew, other things were eye-openers.  When I was homeschooling Zach, in a Christian-themed sense, I had several books by G. A. Henty which were boy-adventure-type books similar to the ones he discusses from the Victorian period.  Like the earlier books, the Henty books pitted young boys against evil Pagan cultures and only their faith in the Christian God got them out of it.

Yes, Christianity, the religion of lies and hyperbole.  But as long as they "spread the kingdom" who cares?

I'm also getting a lot out of The Druid Tradition by Philip Carr-Gomm.  I'm up to the chapter about the 8 festivals so lots of interesting stuff there.  But I also had some books come in at the library, one political and the other about lymphedema, so I need to pick up a bit on the reading.

I'm feeling more energetic today which helps me spiritually as well. Zach and I plan on working in the yard this weekend, getting the faerie garden/grove set up for a full moon ritual in addition to planting some flowers and working in the vegetable garden.  All my crystals need to be charged as well as consecrating some altar tools that seem to have lost their energy as well.

Once I feel like I've built a foundation spiritually I believe I want to learn more about magick.  When I first became a Pagan, I assumed magick was an important aspect of it.  Since then I've realized it's not necessarily.  In fact, in some cases, I've noticed that magick doesn't play a part at all.  My initial excitement about casting spells wore out quite quickly but I've begun to lean in that direction again.  But I'm not ready yet.  I must build that foundation first.

I can hear my cardinal singing in the thicket at the back of the property.  He/she serenades me around this time of day.  What a lovely song it is.  And I must get back to my daily chores now that it's cooled off a bit.  I find myself relying more and more on Brighid these past days as I've been working on regaining my health and strength.  It's been very hard for me to lean on the God/desses as my trust factor is still pretty low.  But I'm getting there.


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