Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Opening up and closing down

With the contentious election behind us it's time to focus on the things closer to home:  spiritual and physical health.  Zach has expressed a desire for joint practices even if we aren't necessarily in the same spiritual place.  I love the idea and have missed having someone to share this with.  It's good to open myself up to having someone else involved in my spiritual practices.

But I have noticed as I get deeper and deeper into my studies that I just don't feel like sharing what I'm learning or what I feel about what I'm learning.  I've never really had that desire for privacy before but I intend to go with my instincts and at least for now, keep that in my private journal.  None of it is secret...just personal.  It may be from time to time that my big mouth overcomes this newfound reticence to share and I'll give an earful but for now...I rather like the idea of keeping something private.  I'm used to closing down but this time it's deliberate and for a reason.

So far Zach and I have had morning and evening rituals.  I keep them brief and simple because I think if something is too elaborate, it can become tedious and people tend to discard things that are tedious.  I do have plans for the Sabbats and Esbats though.  Bigger plans anyway.

He has taken over my animal altar because he wanted something outside of his room.  We're using the altar in my room for a family altar and my hearth altar in the kitchen has become more of a personal place for me.  He is designing the outdoor altar on paper for now.  He's more in a grove kind of mind rather, which I rather like the idea of.  Be using potted plants for the most part since the clothes line is there.  But we can use the clothes line by putting a sheet up there for privacy.  Our neighbor uses his back yard a lot for parties...he's young and has a lot of friends.  They're not intrusive or noisy but we have small yards and no privacy fences so a sheet will help for those evening rituals we want to keep to ourselves.

We're also determined to get out of our shells and start finding a community of other Pagans, no matter what their flavor is.  Cindy moving to this neck of the woods will help although that's still an hour away, but I think most everything we are interested in is at least that far away.  We're in the Bible necklace here, as Zach likes to call it.  It will do us good to push past our comfort zones and get out there.

In the meantime, I continue to study, read and grow spiritually.  That I have to do on my own anyway.



  1. I understand. There are some things I've experienced- some utterly mundane and others at the opposite end of that spectrum- that I simply don't feel compelled to share. Maybe in the right situation, but only then and not before.

    1. I've never been good at keeping things close to the vest so this is a new experience for me. I actually like it but habits being so engrained, I'm not sure if I can continue this way. I hope so.

      On the other hand when the time is right to talk about things, I hope I can realize that.

  2. The SisterWife lives an hour away and my Niece S. lives 90 minutes away. I still see those crazy bitches all the time. You will find time because those that we love nourish our soul.

    1. I'm a very nervous driver in places I don't know so I have to get to know Madison so I can get around there. Once I know it, or at least the areas I plan on visiting, I'll be fine but until then I'll be a basket case every time I go there.

      I do know the mall area and can drive there without any anxiety attacks.

      Plus, the loneliness is worse than the fear of driving there so...