Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Commitment

My forest god statue arrived today.  I'll get pictures of it and my Samhain altar tomorrow, I hope.  I'm really pleased with it.  I chose the more rustic version, partly because of the cost.  It was $20 cheaper.  Cost does matter.  But I got sparkling grape juice for ritual tomorrow night instead of just grape juice.  Sometimes you just have to splurge. 

I'm ready to commit to a path, in part because I think the lack of commitment has bitten me in the ass.  I'm going to have a commitment ritual for Samhain and give myself a year on this path.  At which time I'll see if it's going to be a lifelong thing.  But the lack of commitment on my part has left me drifting in the wind.  I need to take a stand one way or another. 

I'm choosing a druid/witch/nature path of the Celtic flavor.  Cernunnos, having been my constant over the years, seems to be leading me.  I need that for now.  Someone else to lead so I can just follow.  I'm not much of a leader myself.

I'm feeling good but there is an element of fear there that I can't stay with anything for long.  I do need the discipline of a promise, something that I've pledged to commit to.  Zach is also going to commit to his path, which is similar but not exactly like mine.  We do tend to balance each other out.

There probably won't be a fire tomorrow night though.  Rain is predicted.  Like a 100% chance of rain.  If it does rain then we'll just light the fire on Friday during the day.  It doesn't necessarily have to be night.

Early night tonight for me.  I'm so tired of not sleeping again.  I'm trying to get back to the routine I had during cardiac rehab of getting up early and to bed early.  I got more done then.  If Professor or Hannibal would just let me sleep I might achieve that but they wake me up at least 6 times a night.  No door on my bedroom so I can't keep them out.

Maybe that will change soon and I'll get the sleep I need. 

2 comments:

  1. You can do it, Kathy. One step/day at a time and before you know it, the year will be up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Susie. I'm certainly going to give it my best shot. Like you said, though...one step and day at a time. :)

      Delete