Saturday, September 14, 2013

Still here, still eclectic and still pretty darned content

Time is whooshing past me at an alarming speed.  I didn't realize how long it had been since I posted here.  Things are good spiritually.  I'm much more comfortable with this eclectic choice, not spending my time studying a system or "learning" who the gods are.  Instead I'm focusing on magic and learning who I am.  The gods are revealing themselves to me as that happens.  Amazing.

I've known for a long time that the mythologies do more to turn me off the gods than help me get to know them but I just couldn't seem to leave them out of the equation.  It's part of my upbringing...to trust the written word way too much.  Especially bad when you take into account the amount of diddling the "church" did with all the stories about the gods.  I just can't trust them.  Any of them.

I know not all mythologies have been tampered with but still you run into man's interpretation of who the gods are and some modern polytheists dogmatic insistence on adhering to the ancient...or more modern...interpretations of just who the gods are based on those stories.

So...I'm going to learn them without the myths.  Just let them reveal themselves to me.  In the meantime, I'm going to work on magic, spend time with nature and get my house in order.  Thanks to my lengthy illness, the house is in total chaos, needing a good cleaning and a good cleansing.  Trouble is I'm still dealing with awful fatigue so it will take a long time to bring the house into a state that makes me comfortable.  Slow and steady may win the race but when you've got other people still making messes, still having meals to prepare, laundry to do and other daily chores, it's hard to play catch up, let alone get ahead.

Brigit was there this morning when I lit the kitchen candles and the incense.  First time I have felt her presence in years, if ever.  It was nice and the first time I felt her as a hearth goddess.  Most times she seems more of a "saint" than a goddess.  Today, though, she was a goddess.  It was nice to see.  We'll see if she comes back.  Not making any commitments right now, if ever.

I also plan on spending a lot more time on crafts, which I find to be a very spiritual practice.  I don't spend enough time being productive, which I think will help me spiritually.  There is something about the creation process that brings you into a level of spiritual connection with the gods, goddesses and spirits out there.  That's another thing that has been made apparent to me...there are many spirits out there who I am finding a connection with.  I had never really made that attempt before so it's reassuring to find others on the spiritual plateau who are interested in me. 

Time to get busy on knitting today.  Since I'm still battling fatigue, even if it is better than it was before, I'm trying to take advantage of that limitation and use it to focus on my crafts.  It definitely improves my mood and my self-esteem.

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