On the advice of Rue, I ordered Power Spellcraft For Life from Amazon.com. I was going to order from one of the merchants listed on Amazon for less, but their rating wasn't high enough for my standards. So for another buck-fifty I got it from the big store. The book had very high ratings and excellent reviews, not to mention Rue herself suggested it so I can't wait to get it. I like that it gets behind the working of spells and doesn't just offer some spells to use.
This whole forging my own path thing is difficult for me. Zach and I had lunch out yesterday so I could bounce some things off of him and it occurred to me that my foundation of all-or-nothing is so much a part of my foundation it's hard for me to take things from here and there and create my own recipe for spirituality. I wonder if I will ever be able to overcome the damage Christianity (fundamentalism, in particular) has done to me.
So while I try to just go with it and make it mine, I'm still battling a need to have walls, a roof and hymnbooks for my spiritual temple. It just ain't easy being my own boss. Still it is a bit exciting to try things and make my own determination if they are beautiful architecture or just a prison cell. One thing I tried on felt so restricting that I could barely breathe before I quickly broke through the cell doors. From now on I'll be a bit more circumspect before inspecting a room in the spiritual temple I'm building.
I ended up giving my Green Man pendant to Zach. For some reason it didn't sit right around my neck, didn't feel like it was mine. I loved looking at it and enjoyed having it, but didn't like wearing it. So I asked him if he wanted it and he said yes so quickly I knew it was his all along. I've decided that, from now on, any jewelry I own will either be an in-person purchase, or one I make myself. I found an owl pendant I loved and am making a chain for it and today found a necklace with Celtic spirals on it. I intend to get rid of some of the extraneous dangles and just keep the spirals. Plus it had earrings, too. And it's hypo-allergenic. I'm allergic to nickel. Terribly allergic to nickel so that is a big issue. I really don't need to be blatant about my spiritual path, as I did when I was a Christian. I had so many cross necklaces it wasn't even funny.
See? I am learning to leave the Christian trappings behind. I just wish it was happening faster.
BB
This whole forging my own path thing is difficult for me. Zach and I had lunch out yesterday so I could bounce some things off of him and it occurred to me that my foundation of all-or-nothing is so much a part of my foundation it's hard for me to take things from here and there and create my own recipe for spirituality. I wonder if I will ever be able to overcome the damage Christianity (fundamentalism, in particular) has done to me.
So while I try to just go with it and make it mine, I'm still battling a need to have walls, a roof and hymnbooks for my spiritual temple. It just ain't easy being my own boss. Still it is a bit exciting to try things and make my own determination if they are beautiful architecture or just a prison cell. One thing I tried on felt so restricting that I could barely breathe before I quickly broke through the cell doors. From now on I'll be a bit more circumspect before inspecting a room in the spiritual temple I'm building.
I ended up giving my Green Man pendant to Zach. For some reason it didn't sit right around my neck, didn't feel like it was mine. I loved looking at it and enjoyed having it, but didn't like wearing it. So I asked him if he wanted it and he said yes so quickly I knew it was his all along. I've decided that, from now on, any jewelry I own will either be an in-person purchase, or one I make myself. I found an owl pendant I loved and am making a chain for it and today found a necklace with Celtic spirals on it. I intend to get rid of some of the extraneous dangles and just keep the spirals. Plus it had earrings, too. And it's hypo-allergenic. I'm allergic to nickel. Terribly allergic to nickel so that is a big issue. I really don't need to be blatant about my spiritual path, as I did when I was a Christian. I had so many cross necklaces it wasn't even funny.
See? I am learning to leave the Christian trappings behind. I just wish it was happening faster.
BB
I have a nickel allergy too. It sucks, doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteIt does indeed. I can't afford the good stuff and even sterling silver must have some amount of nickel in it because it breaks me out, too.
ReplyDelete